Reaching Out: Pay It Forward

Never in a million years did I think this blog would be such an inspiration to others. My story has reached many people. This blog was started to keep friends and family informed about my surgery and recovery, but it has grown bigger. Through this blog Cathy O'Grady and I have bonded. She is from Massachusetts and does charity work for the Boston Children's Hospital. She decided to use MUSC, where I had my surgery, for a Toy Drive. My dad's barbershop, Charlie's Barbershop, is taking donated toys. Cathy is flying to Charleston and we will be personally delivering the toys to MUSC and the Ronald McDonald House on December 7th. I will provide links to her website and blog for more information at the end of this post. I will also provide my dad's address so you can ship your toys to be delivered on the 7th.

A Public Service Announcement (PSA) was made in mine and Cathy's honor by Fox24. Here is the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJSJnStCzDY&feature=youtu.be

I encourage all of you to watch, read about, and participate in this Toy Drive. Every little gift makes a difference. I can vouch for this myself. Just having a teddy bear to hold during my week stay at MUSC made a world of difference. And yes I was 20 going on 21 years old, squeezing my poor teddy to death while getting shots. Some of these kids might not have a family to celebrate Christmas with this year. And with your help we can make their day brighter. I definitely feel for the children who have to spend their Christmas in a hospital. I was in the hospital during my surgery for a little over a week, and I was so ready to be home in my own bed. Some children have extended stays in the hospital and have to be there for long periods of time.

My dad, Charlie Druelle, needs to be recognized as well. He has a big heart and is always thinking about others before himself. He has had it rough the past two years with his business. People have forgotten how much he cares for this community in the midst of these hardships. I can remember being in elementary school running late for church. We stopped by the store to get our favorite "greeting people mints". When we pulled up in the parking lot, a man had the hood of his car lifted and a fire started. My dad parked our car and rushed to the scene. No one offered to help the man besides my dad. So my dad took it upon himself to help the guy, and pulled off his brand new Lionel Smith suit coat and smothered the flames with it. Nothing has changed since then. He would still give the shirt off his back to someone in need. He goes to customers to give them hair cuts when they can't go to him. I have known him to go to hospitals, nursing homes, and people's houses who weren't able to make a trip to the barbershop. His kindness has once again shown through in the MUSC Toy Drive. Deliveries are pouring in, and the back room of his shop is filling up with boxes.  He is expecting more toys as the days go by, so I decided to wait until more deliveries are made before I photographed them. I will have more photos posted to the blog later this week.

My dad and I at his barbershop today! 

Cathy told me today while discussing the toy drive, "Amazing how God puts people in our lives when He does. Facebook isn't so bad after all." I wholeheartedly agree with this statement. Without this blog or Facebook, we would not be able to reach out to others. I think it IS amazing how God can use a few websites to bring people together. I do believe this blog is serving a greater purpose and has given me opportunities to change people's lives. MUSC is going to have some very happy children on December 7th, and I am so thankful to be a part of it. I have always prayed to have an opportunity to make a difference in someone's life, prayed for something bigger than myself. My surgery has allowed me this opportunity. The pain and difficult recovery I am still facing has been worth it by far.

Also, a special thanks to Cathy O'Grady for all you've done and continue to do!

How can you help? 

Send your toys to Charlie's Barbershop: 

126 Dominion Drive 

Suite 1050 

Aiken SC, 29803

Visit the links to gain more knowledge about the MUSC Toy Drive:
Cathy's Creations blog:
http://creationscathys.blogspot.com

Cathy's Creations website: 

http://www.cathyscreationsjewelry.com

Cathy's Creations fanpage on Facebook: 

https://www.facebook.com/cathyscreationsjewelry 

Charlie's Barbershop fanpage on Facebook: 

https://www.facebook.com/Chuckydabarber

Help us PAY IT FORWARD!

Marriage Isn't For Me

I have seen the "Marriage Isn't For You" blog article pop up on my Facebook timeline. And what perfect timing. I love when I read something and it just speaks to a situation I have been in or dealing with at the moment. And this is where my surgery comes into play. It has been a blessing in so many ways. Prior to surgery, Chris and I were having a hard time. I couldn't understand why things weren't going anywhere, especially considering we had been together 6 years. Having a baby at a young age was hard and has made us grow up quickly. We have lost friends along the way and people we thought would always be there. It was hard having to realize we can't do the things we used to, now we have a child to think about. Having this surgery has put Chris in a whole new light for me, for which I am very grateful. I am one to always focus on the negative, which I can not do after this surgery. I can't emotionally or physically handle focusing on the negative anymore while trying to recover.

Before surgery I would always harp on the bad things Chris did, the way he talked to me when he got angry, or what he didn't do. I was constantly comparing him to other girl's boyfriends, fiancés, or husbands. Ladies you should never do this. I got myself into a lot of trouble thinking "the grass was greener on the other side".  It took me awhile to finally learn that someone else's grass was no greener than my own. No one has the perfect relationship and everyone struggles. The struggles I was facing were in MYSELF. Before surgery I was convinced Chris and I would never  be able to get married or even make a marriage work. I was too focused on what he wasn't instead of what he was. Even though Chris did a lot of good things for me, I refused to see this. He was always there for me when my health issues were getting the best of me. He bought me a SECOND engagement ring for Mother's Day. He took me to Savannah for a weekend before my surgery. But instead of being thankful for all of this, I put my focus on the things I thought he should be doing for me. 

After surgery while I was in the hospital Chris was by my side. This meant more to me than anything. Just the fact he was there. He would stay the night with me, would buzz the nurses when I was in pain, and would keep me company through the whole week. He even missed class some days to be with me. I have learned to cherish the little moments and the little things he does. Last Tuesday I had a seizure and while I was in the hospital I kept saying I wanted a big slice of chocolate cake. When I got home that night, Chris took it upon himself to get me a bunch of sweets and my favorite sparkling juice. We joke I am a "Sparkaholic", since I don't drink alcohol. I haven't been able to do much after surgery and I have not fully recuperated. So we stay at home most of the time and watch Redbox movies or Netflix.

Chris is a quiet person and doesn't express himself often in words, and I can be the same way. Communication, we have learned, is an important part of a relationship. We have learned to talk about our problems instead of ignore them. In order to make this work I have had to come to the conclusion I have to find the positive in EVERYTHING. I can't focus on me or my feelings and I have to consider Chris in all I do. He has to do the same by me as well. The "Marriage Isn't For You" article states marriage is truly about making someone else happy, and I have struggled with this. I was so focused on finding MY HAPPINESS and I was not considering Chris' happiness. My favorite quote from the article is "My father's advice was both shocking and revelatory. It went against the grain of today's "Walmart philosophy", which is if it doesn't make you happy, you can take it back and get a new one." This really stuck out to me, because we do often think happiness can be found in someone else if we aren't happy who we're with currently. Happiness can't be found in other people, it must be found in ourselves. 

I decided after surgery to go try on wedding dresses (even though I already had one), for a new beginning. I went with my mom to try on dresses yesterday (November 5th). Since my chest was different as well as my outlook on our relationship, I thought it would be a perfect opportunity to find a wedding dress. I was so happy I had this experience. I ended up finding THE dress of my dreams and I am looking forward to an upcoming wedding. 

After I found THE dress. I made Logan go up to Charlotte's Bridal to see me in it! She stayed with Haiden until Chris got out of class, then drove to see all the excitement. :)

Miss Brittany was so wonderful. She helped me find THE dress! :) I can't thank her enough! She definitely made this day special!

I am finally happy about mine and Chris' relationship and the changes we have made. I am looking forward to our future with Haiden as well. I have realized MARRIAGE ISN'T FOR ME, it's for Chris and Haiden as well. I want nothing more than for us to be a family. Haiden is our reason for fighting and making things work. Haiden's happiness is our happiness. 

I encourage everyone to read the "Marriage Isn't For You" article. I will provide the link below:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/seth-adam-smith/marriage-isnt-for-you_b_4209837.html?utm_hp_ref=tw

Twenty-One

Greatest Gift 

I celebrated my 21st Birthday yesterday with my family and my, WITHOUT my Pectus. This is the best Birthday present I could ask for.

I didn't have an ordinary 21st Birthday celebration. I was in a great deal of pain, but I had a wonderful day regardless. I also got to hold Haiden for the first time in a whole month!

No I didn't have any alcoholic beverages. I actually have never consumed alcohol. I had a Professor at a journalism camp tell our class that he had never had alcohol in his life, and he was in his late forties. I want to be able to say that one day. Chris didn't have any alcohol for his birthday either. For me turning 21 is more than being able to drink. To me 21 was another year to be thankful for. I'm thankful I came out of a major surgery with no complications, and I was able to spend my birthday with my family and my son.

Logan and her boyfriend Cameron joined Chris and I for the "festivities". We looked through old family photos and had many laughs, which is still hard for me to do after the surgery. Cameron fits right in don't you think?

We enjoyed a delicious ice cream cake from Marble Slab

PRESENTS

I will say, Chris ALWAYS gets me the best presents. He can be so thoughtful. He got me the sweetest card. He got me Flower Bomb perfume and St. Tropez self tanner that I have been wanting for months. He also bought me the newest Nicolas Sparks book, who is my FAVORITE.  

FROM: Haiden :) I got Minnie Mouse nail polish and the CUTEST sparkly slippers! I wish I would have had these in the hospital. 

NEXT WEEK: 

Since I wasn't able to go out for my birthday, my mom is taking my sister and I to Charleston to go shopping on King Street. 

Sharing my Birthday? 

Yes I share my birthday with Christopher. :) We have had 7 birthdays total together. We started dating when we were 14 and celebrated our first joint birthday at 15 years old. Before we started dating I really liked him. Girls, I know you have all done this so don't laugh at me. I told myself "If we are meant to be, his birthday will be in October." We were messaging back and forth on Myspace, asking the general "pre-dating" questions. So of course I asked when his birthday was and he replied "October 11. When is your's?" I told him mine was on the 10th. He said "Oh. Well I guess I can't ask you out then. My mom says I can't date older women." So maybe we're just meant to be, cheesy right? Not only is Christopher's birthday in October, he was born 14 hours after I was. I was born in SC, and he was born in FL. We give a whole new meaning to the song "When God made you, he must have been thinking about me". So yes we are A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN, literally. Little did I know we would have our own child together one day. We've been through so much, and some days I think I might hate him. Yet I can't help but love him, no matter what comes our way. I like to compare our relationship to Pink and her husband Carey Hart. They have been through a lot to and she describes their love as "COMPLICATED". Her song 'True Love' perfectly describes mine and Chris' relationship. My family and friends can vouch for this. But I don't want to give up the memories, I just want to make more. 

For our 15th birthday (our first one together) we had my mom take pictures of us. This one below was one. We used one of these pictures for our birthday invitations. 

Our first Celebration: 

TONIGHT 
Tonight we celebrated at Outback Steakhouse with Haiden and the Rautio family. I said today was Chris' "Bad Luck Birthday". Poor thing got in a wreck and a few minutes before time to leave Haiden grabbed my straightener and burnt his finger. Haiden was not in a good mood afterwards and I felt so bad he had gotten hurt. Luckily the burn wasn't as bad as I thought, so no trip to the ER thank goodness. We had a wonderful time anyways and made the best of it.

 Poor Haiden! This is his "grumpy gills" face. 

Thank you everyone for the birthday wishes! 

Fantastic Follow-Up :)

My follow-up appointment at MUSC was this morning. I was excited about this appointment and getting to see the Pediatric Surgeon Staff!

Dr. Hebra told me everything looked great. My incisions healed nicely, and I should be able to be more active in the weeks to come. He asked me if I was more confident and if I was happy with the surgery. I replied YES to both questions! Of course I asked him for a photo with me for my blog. I felt honored! He did such a wonderful job with the surgery and he is a great doctor. 

ONE MONTH POST-SURGERY EXPECTATIONS: 

Dr. Hebra told me to practice holding Haiden. He said for me to start out holding him and not to lift him quite yet. He said lifting him would take some time. I also have to lift 5 lb weights everyday. Dr. Hebra wants me to wear myself out by walking or running. He wants me tired by the end of the day! This will relieve tension and will be good for my lungs and heart. I still have to take things slow, but the chances of the bar moving are very slim at this point. 

I wanted to visit the nurses who took care of me during surgery. I ran into Sam, one of the therapy dogs I saw when I got to sit up for the FIRST time in the hospital! He's so calm and sweet! 

After the appointment, I went with my mom and sister to Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. and the Charleston Market. The night before my surgery we went to Bubba Gump and our WHOLE MEAL was paid for. Our WHOLE meal was paid for AGAIN today! So thank you mysterious meal payer! My family and I really appreciate it! :) 

At the Charleston Market I found the cutest ring! My mom got it for me, since tomorrow is my 21st birthday. I told her I had to get it because it looked like a bunch of sideways 'S's for SERA :) Ring buying from the Market is a tradition. My mom bought me a ring when I was 5 years old, then another when I was 10. I wore the second ring up until I was a Senior in High School. She thought it was time for a new one! 

Oh Pectus, I don't miss you...

I found an old picture from 8th grade and it really shows how severe my pectus was. I thought I would share. I didn't realize how terrible my chest looked. I had grown so used to my dent, and most of the time I ignored it. I AM BEYOND GLAD IT'S FINALLY GONE! 

My "dent" is very visible in this photo

Considering Surgery anyone?

I would definitely recommend this surgery for those with Pectus. Especially if it is interfering with your breathing and your daily life. I am very thankful and blessed I was able to have this procedure. Yes it was painful and still is painful, but I am happy with everything and I know my lungs will be happy as well :) 

Almost ONE MONTH!

It has been almost ONE MONTH since my surgery. I have been trying to adjust to being at home and not being able to do much. This has been the hardest part. I have gotten out of the house a few times. But I'm not quite recovered and I've still been in some pain. I can't lift my arms about my head yet and I'm nervous about picking Haiden up for the first time. I see the doctor for a follow up appointment on October 9th (the day before my birthday) to discuss everything with him.

AFTER

BEFORE 

AFTER

BEFORE

Adjusting/Recovery 

I think the hardest part about recovery is the pain and the nausea, and both go along with this surgery. Even with pain medicine my chest still hurts. It gets better day by day, and some days are worse than others. Nights are difficult too because I can't sleep on my sides. I lay on my back with plenty of pillows under my upper back and head. 

I have been able to get out of the house a few times this past week. I did end up getting sick in the car on one of those trips. GROSS. Throwing up with a metal bar in your chest is painful and I started crying. 

Thanks mom for the lovely photo ;)

I was sure to take a lot of pictures while I was out and about! :) My first outing was to get yarn from Hobby Lobby. I am making infant hats for babies at the Boston Hospital! 

I also went to Lowe's with Christopher and afterwards we took Haiden to Halloween City! Chris kept asking why I was taking so many photos. I told him, "It's my first time out of the house since surgery! I have to capture everything!" 

The next day I went to pick out baby pumpkins for Haiden. And yes it was after this trip I got sick in the car. I'm looking a little green in this photo! 

After getting sick,  I went home to change and then visited my sister Logan at her new job! 

Relaxation is KEY

I have found that I have been very tense after surgery. Being in pain in my chest area scares me, which causes tension. I have had to tell myself it won't hurt forever and relax. I use a handmade lavender scented heating pad. I just pop it in the microwave for a few minutes before I go to sleep. During the day I try to keep busy and keep my mind occupied. I have bought books and I have been working on my crochet projects. 

Handmade lavender heating pad and my most recent book purchase

REGRETS? 

I have no regrets at all after this surgery. Yes, it has been painful and the hospital stay was rough. But God was with me and still is. I am so thankful I came out of surgery fine and I am still doing well. I could not have asked for a better outcome. I feel so much better about my chest. I can look down and I no longer see a dent! My posture also looks amazing. I am very pleased with how everything looks! 

THANK YOU 

Thank you everyone for the kind words, your support, and the gifts. I have wonderful friends and family. I am looking forward to my 21st birthday on the 10th and being "BOOBIE DENT FREE"! 

Sera's Surgery

My week at MUSC was an adventure to say the least. I was told going into the surgery this was the one of most painful operations performed at MUSC by Dr. Hebra, my Pectus surgeon. No one can prepare you for the pain you endure after this procedure. I was lucky to have the support of my family during this time. I also had many people praying for me and I did much praying myself. The night before surgery I got ZERO sleep. I was so nervous about the procedure. I had to check into the surgery waiting room at 5:30am Monday, September 9th. The thing I was most afraid of was being put to sleep. Everyone reassured me this would be the least of my worries.

BEFORE SURGERY
I was trying to stay calm. I had my family by my side. My Pastor came and prayed with me and my parents. This helped me so much and I felt so much more relaxed. I relied on God for my comfort and the fact my family was with me. I was warned about the risks involved and the pain associated with the procedure. I remained positive and talked myself through the last few minutes before surgery. I went to the operating room at 6:55 AM.

AFTER SURGERY

After finally coming to my senses after being under the knife, I was in rough shape. I looked like the living dead. I was doing okay, and I was dealing with the pain. I had an epidural, but the pain was still there. I also was given IV pain medicines as well. My chest felt really tight when I would breathe in and out. I was most tender under my right arm, which is where the "stabilizer" is. Dr. Hebra told me this would be the most painful spot. The stabilizer is expanding my ribs which is causing the most pain. The stabilizer keeps the metal bar in my chest in place. 

DAY TWO 

Tuesday was my WORST day. My epidural quit working around 7 PM. My day time Pain Management team was AMAZING, but that night there was some miscommunication among the hospital staff. I did not get any pain relief until 2AM. My mom was with my that night and stayed by me. I had to talk myself through the excruciating pain. I felt like I could not breathe, my "pain level" was at a 10, and I was in a panic. I had never been in that much pain, even during child birth. I had to talk myself through the situation. My mom had to talk to me as well. I did not quit praying. I tried not to cry, because it made my chest hurt worse. I could not hold back the tears. I eventually got some sleep and my day time Pain Management Team came in at 7AM and my epidural was working shortly after. 

DAY THREE 

By Wednesday I was sitting and standing. I was fighting pain, feeling nauseous, and the urge to faint. I got through it and being in a chair was much better than being in the hospital bed! 

DAY FOUR 

I got to walk down the hall! I was beyond excited to be out of my room. It was a huge accomplishment, considering I could not even lift my head on Monday. 

DAY FIVE 

NO MORE EPIDURAL! I finally could be epidural free. I will explain really fast how this worked. The epidural was placed higher up than when I had Haiden. It was in between my shoulder blades to numb my chest and arms. This is known as the "T3 and T4" regions. I was so glad to be able to feel my fingers, but this meant I had to adjust to the pain as well. I was given oral pain medication along with the IV medications. 

DAY SIX 

By this day I was moved to another room. The doctors revealed to me I would be returning home the next day. They were preparing me for leaving the hospital and what to expect. I had to work on taking deep breaths and reach a certain number on this little device before I was given the okay to leave the hospital. 

DAY SEVEN 

I was discharged from MUSC. When I got in the car with my mom I started bawling. When she asked me why I was crying I replied "I'm just so happy to be going home".  I had a room full of flowers given to me at the hospital and a brand new Coach purse on my bed. I won the Coach purse thanks to a wonderful woman involved with the Children's Hospital in Boston. She entered my name in the drawing and I won! 

MORE FROM MY HOSPITAL STAY:

THERAPY DOGS 

I was visited by therapy dogs. It made me feel so much better. We watched the monitors and it IS true what they say about petting dogs lowering your blood pressure! 

COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS, NOT YOUR PROBLEMS 

There was a little boy two rooms down from me before I was moved. He had no family and watched TV and ate by himself every night. Chris kept telling me about how he was just sitting on the edge of his bed with his tray. Chris would walk by his room, since his door would always be open. He would tell me he would be playing with toys or watching SpongeBob. So Chris took it upon himself to buy him more toys to make him feel better. We were not allowed to give them to the little boy, due to patient privacy. My nurse took the toys to him and told us he was having a blast after opening them. This made me aware of how blessed I was. I have never been left alone without family at a hospital at any point in my life. I had a family and this little boy who was about 7 years old was alone. He did not have a mom to comfort him after getting a shot. He didn't have family to visit him and tell how much they loved him. I just wanted to take him home. I was told his hospital stay was a long one and it would be awhile before he was discharged. He was the cutest little boy and had the sweetest face. He was always smiling despite his circumstances. 

ALL IN ALL 

I am happy with the end result of my surgery. I will gladly put up "After" pictures when I start to feel better. My chest looks wonderful and I am praying for a speedy recovery! My mom actually got a picture of me blogging. When I wasn't looking! I told her NO PHOTOS TODAY (haha).